Tales of a Neurotic Cat.

I have a five year old cat who is very dumb. As you can see, I love this animal. Well, yes and no. Sometimes she gives me those irresistible eyes that say: "Can you take me to my food." Sometimes I feel sorry for her but other times I just wanna wring her neck. She meows like crazy and then attempts to make that prrr sound. Not purring but a sound that is an adamodapia. (Sorry, don't know how to spell it).

Years ago when we got her, Angel, which is her name, was a tiny kitten who was a nervous ninny. She loved it when we gave her fresh milk and when we picked her up. You could hold her in basically any position possible. Now she gets nervous if you touch her and she usually wants to hiss if your not careful. In short, she turned into a mean little kitty with a lot of spunk.

She is anti-social usually since she hates guests. However, when we're sitting in the family room she'll come in but she'll face the other way. She wants to be with us, but doesn't wanna see us. She has an obsession for laying her head on this bar under the coffee table and licking incessantly. She likes licking in certain parts which I will not discuss publicly. I like to think of our relationship kinda like Gollum and Smeagol. Hate-love relationship.

Her body clock is messed up as she sleeps on the top bunk of my bed all day and proceeds to run laps around the house like a horse at night. When we pray the Angelus she thinks we're praying to her and lays down like a queen in front of the image of Our Lady. I hate it when she lies down on my lap and marches for a minute and then leaves cuz she hears some tiny noise. I could go on and on but I won't. Funny story: when we first moved into our house she slept in our bathroom sink. To stop this; I turned the water on at full blast. She never attempted to sleep there again.

I hope y'all have a great Saturday and watching Michigan trample on Nebraska and watch Michigan State get creamed by Indiana.

Happy Saturday!

-Gabe Heffernan