Depression and what I find helpful for it

Note: I am not an expert but hopefully I can help with some knowledge simply from my own experience and research.

This is very personal to me as I have experienced this for the past few years.

First of all know that depression nor anxiety make you an abnormal or insane person. Its not a disease. It is a common occurrence among normal people. In fact, studies have shown that 1 in every 4 people, has or has had depression. Its a battle people face every day, every hour, every minute. Sometimes even the most basic, minuscule tasks are exhausting or overwhelming. Sometimes people question their own existence and don't want to get up in the morning out of fear of people, fear of the world, fear of failure or lack of motivation, lack of interest. The list goes on. Depression can have fear, anxiety, sadness and loneliness linked to it. There's more than just sadness in the depression equation.

Depression can be described in so many different ways. Furthermore, it varies in severity from person to person and it differs among the sexes as well. (This is one article by The Art of Manliness which offers really good insight on symptoms of male depression: http://www.artofmanliness.com/2015/03/24/leashing-the-black-dog-the-symptoms-of-depression/). I know my depression and that of young mother are very different. Some symptoms and patterns remain fairly the same, but really each person has their own case. This is not to say however, that you cannot identify or speak with someone who has depression. It is often very helpful and therapeutic to speak to someone with depression that you feel comfortable talking to about it.

Depression is not necessarily consistent

Depression is one of those things which can be difficult to describe. It comes and goes, its not necessarily the same every time. For me it comes in bouts of 2-3 days at a time and then its gone. Some people it lasts weeks, months or unfortunately in some cases, years. Every person's is different and not all coping mechanisms or therapies help for everyone. The following are signs that a person may be experiencing depression:

-profound sadness (sometimes there is no root, that's the key. It can come from nowhere)
-inability to concentrate
-extreme fatigue
-lack of interest in things you usually like to do
-insomnia (can't sleep or trouble getting back to sleep)
-hypersomnia (oversleeping)
-not eating properly
-binge eating
-random anger
-sudden mood swings
-suicidal thoughts or tendencies
-thoughts or speaking about death on a regular basis

Again, these may not all happen at once or it might just be one of them. Hopefully they don't all happen at once. And of course, some of these are very serious and should be dealt with immediately.

Ways I cope and maybe you can too and other ideas

I cope differently every time I experience depression. Sometimes I exercise, I write down my feelings, I listen to music, I sing (I'm in choirs for this very reason actually), I pray, I take a nap, I watch a stupid video on youtube. These are some things I do. I find the arts very therapeutic and they bring me out of myself, which is always a good thing if you're feeling lonely. (I happen to be a theatre major so its convenient for me). I would not recommend eating as a coping mechanism or sleeping for that matter. Taking a nap can help with the fatigue sometimes or just calming your mind and body down. Food can be dangerous. Sometimes a good candy bar or piece of beef jerky can pucker us up. Don't put all your coping into food (don't put all your eggs in one basket) because it may become addicting and if your depression hits a lot, it can be very unhealthy. Your body will want specific foods when you feel depressed. I will never recommend alcohol as that is even more addicting. (Only drink when you're happy, its a good rule of thumb). 

What can you do for someone who is depressed?

First, never say to them to suck it up, or get over it. That is never helpful. Sometimes that person wants to disappear or take their own life and that's the last thing they need to hear. Furthermore, they're lonely and may feel unloved. They need to be loved. You don't have to talk to them. Just be there for them and with them. You may not be able to help them in the moment and that's ok! At least they don't have to fight it alone. Depression involved a lot of fighting and combating. Sometimes its combating your own feelings or your own mind.

In short, depression is hard. Its indescribable sometimes. Know however, you're not alone. Its one of those things you might think you're the only person in the world which has it but there are millions of people struggling along with you.

Feel free to comment or ask me any questions about it. You're in my prayers.

Happy Catholics

Christ calls all of us to be joyful. There are too many angry people in this society. The last thing we need are angry Catholics. As men and women of God, we have a duty to show the love of God to others. Part of that love is happiness. Being cheerful and fun is contagious. Why would someone want to become a Christian after seeing some mopey, gloomy people? Some people may not realize this, but Catholic can have fun too. We can throw a huge party without having to undermine our morality. Sports, movies, a good cigar, a bottle of Guinness, these are all good and wholesome. There is no sin in them! Remember to be moderate with them of course! Go out there and show the world that Catholics have fun too. Jesus wants you to.    

Modesty: God loves it and we should too

Modesty is one of the virtues which many people commonly ignore. Many of us do not even think about it. It hardly ever crosses our minds. Guys especially ignore it. Objectively speaking, an immodestly dressed woman is more shocking than an immodestly dressed man. Let's face it: girls are more distracting than guys. That is why I am against girl altar servers at mass. (That is a whole other topic).

Does a girl really think before she puts something on? Does she ask herself: am I wearing something that is dignified, gives glory to God and is feminine? Those are three key factors. God created masculinity and femininity. Lets give glory to him by dressing according to our gender and dignity. Satan is trying to reverse genders. He wants men to think they're women and vice versa.

Girls, let me make it as clear to you as I can. When you put on a revealing top or show anything that should not be shown, you give a man the chance to lust after you. He does not see you as a beautiful, God-made woman. He sees you as an object and thus he will treat you like that. Princeton University once did a study with its male students. After all the research was done, they found that when a man saw a woman in a bikini or in something revealing, the part of the brain that sparks ideas of tools was stimulated.

So girls, when a man sees you in revealing clothing, he thinks of hammers and screwdrivers. Do you want to be held responsible for a man's degrading thoughts? I didn't think so. Furthermore, dressing immodestly doesn't further your cause for sanctity. So, next time you put on your clothes, think about your God-given dignity and what does a man think of when he sees you.

Does your outward appearance give glory to God? 

Whats the deal with being proud?

Why do we act so critical? We have such weak natures and yet are so quick to criticize other people. Or we can do better than someone else under the circumstances they are in. We have no idea what their situation is and think that since we're so much larger than life we can possibly do better.

Lets put it in perspective. God is infinite. We are finite. What does finite mean? Limited. Since we are limited creatures, we are weak and can't do much without God's help. So many times we say, "I can do it myself," and then realize later that we failed terribly.

Also since we are limited and God is unlimited, we many times cannot understand the way God works. His ways are not our ways. God has already made plans for us and yet we try to understand them as humans do. We even go so far as to make our own plans. There is an old saying that if you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans. We try to do things our own way. We brag about our accomplishments such as grades, money we make or places we've been to. None of these things matter in the eternal run. Yet we put so much emphasis on earthly achievements and pay little or no attention to our spiritual achievements.

Next time we feel like bragging, lets ask ourselves: would God care? and how does this help me get to heaven?  

Sacred Music

Sacred Music has been quite a controversial subject within the church. Bishops, priest and popes have discussed this matter for nearly half a century. What is the hype about? Why talk about it? Is it really that important?

What is the hype about? Sacred Music is a large part of the church's richness. It takes its place within the liturgy and the external aspect of the church. The church is proud of its heritage of sacred music. But, why is it such a big deal? Well, music is a form of art and the arts are meant to convey beauty. Beauty gives glory to God. Thus, music, paintings and sculptures are supposed to glorify God and illustrate his beauty. Sacred Music has been essential to the life of the church since its early days. Although it has evolved and undergone developments, music has always been there. Sacred Music has never ceased to be a vital part of the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass as well as other liturgical rituals.

Why talk about it? It is very necessary to discuss the important elements of Catholic life. Music will never die in the life of the church. Although it has both grown and deteriorated, music is ever-present. Music, especially within the context of the Mass, is a gift from God. Many men and women are granted musical talent through their voice, an instrument or composition. God gave it to them for a reason: to give it back to him and to use it for his glory.

Is it really that important? Music is vital. Period. The Holy Sacrifice of the mass, as I have often said, is the renewal of Christ's sacrifice on Calvary. The music we hear at mass is supposed to edify the soul and raise our minds to God. If it doesn't, then it has no place in the mass. Many churches play beautiful music, but it is inappropriate for mass. Praise and worship style of song should not be inserted into the mass. The choir at mass should represent the choirs of angels giving glory to God in heaven. Is singing to God with a guitar at mass a good representation of the angels singing to God almighty? I don't think so. I hope this is clear.

Do not get me wrong. It is not a sin to play praise and worship songs in mass. It is preferred by the church to not do so. Rock and roll type of music during mass is definitely a near occasion of sin as it plays with the baser instincts of people. Your not supposed to "feel good" during mass. Your supposed to be standing at the foot of the cross. You're supposed to unite your whole being with Christ the victim as he is sacrificed on that altar. If you think music is unimportant or that any type of music can be played at mass, think again! 

The Mass: Christ's Sacrifice on Calvary

The mass is the most essential part of the Catholic faith. Everything is centered around it. It is the best prayer a person can say, they can receive the body, blood, soul and divinity of Christ and receive many graces as a result. Wow, what a privilege to be Catholic! The God who created the trees, plants, prancing deer, quacking ducks, bathing cats, barking dogs, swimming fish and neighing horses is present at mass.

Yet, even with this knowledge, Catholics take the mass for granted. Since they don't "feel good" when they come out of mass, they decide not to go altogether. The greatest gift that Christ gave to us was his body and yet we either ignore it or receive it with no enthusiasm or love. As they're in line waiting to receive their creator, redeemer, father and friend, they're day-dreaming about the game last night or what they should wear for the party later that day. You have twenty-four hours in a day. Mass takes usually half and a hour to an hour. I think you can pause to think about God for a small chunk of time.

There is also a lack of enthusiasm for the mass because of ignorance. Plus, there are "Saint Suburbia" masses with people in flip-flops, gum in their mouth and electric guitars. Many people do not feel attracted to mass because of the lack of reverence or simply because they have no idea what's going on. I can't blame them.

Don't get me wrong, all masses are valid if the words of consecration are said correctly. Mass is mass. Beggars can't be choosers sometimes. Keep in mind however, that the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass is the most sacred thing a person can experience. That's pretty huge. Would you not rather go to a mass which reminds you of Christ's death on Calvary? You're not supposed to go because you like the preaching or the music. You are supposed to go to mass because you love Jesus Christ! Christ himself said: "If you do not eat my flesh nor drink my blood, you will not inherit eternal life." In other words, if you don't go to mass or if you go without realizing what you're doing, you won't get to heaven. It's that simple.

Our faith is not about feelings. Mass can be boring. You may not like that it's in Latin. You may be in a bad mood. Whatever. Go to mass anyways. Go as often as you can. There is no excuse not to go. God is always first. God will ask you how much did you love him when you are judged. It would be embarrassing to say that you never or rarely went to mass.

Let's face it folks, mass is a prerequisite to Heaven and it's pretty easy to achieve. Christ loves and wants to enter your body. Let him. Give him that chance!

For the Greater Glory of God

Let me start by asking a question: Do I think before I act? That is an interesting question. Before I perform any action, do I consider how it will affect my soul or those of others? These questions are what we should ask ourselves before performing any action.

St. Ignatius of Loyola wrote something in his Spiritual Exercises called "Principle and Foundation." In the first paragraph he writes: "Man is created to praise, reverence, and serve God our Lord, and by this means to save his soul."

That is the end of man. In other words, man's final goal is to glorify God in everything he does and by that, he saves his own soul. Well, that is pretty clear then. God put us on this earth to praise and glorify him. What else must we do but that? Nothing else matters. Praising God in everything we do is all that counts. Our life must be spent in glorifying God and everything must be converted into a means for obtaining that end. God gave us life on this earth. The least we can do is love him back by glorifying him in every action we perform. 

Our actions do not just affect God but others around us too. As Charlie O'Rourke said, "We do not know if even one of our tiniest actions can affect someone else." I am paraphrasing of course but I think the point gets across. If we affect others by our actions, then it affects God as well. God is in every single person as he created them and is their father. 

Furthermore, God gave each and every one of us, talents to utilize. Some can write, others can sing, others are intellectually able, others are athletes. God gave you a talent and it is your duty to use it for his glory. If he gave you a good singing voice then I challenge you to use it for his glory and the edification of other people's souls. If God gave you the ability to express thoughts through writing or acting, then I challenge you to use it for Him.

Our actions have infinite consequences. Always ask yourself before you perform any action: Is this going to glorify God? If yes, then proceed. If no, then you better rethink and stop what you're doing. Because of our fallen and weak nature, it is very easy to sin. In fact, in almost all cases, it feels better to sin because it satisfies our inordinate desires. Think of it this way. When you are on your death bed, you will analyze your whole life and every action you performed. Would you not want to think back to that time when you refrained from punching the guy in the face? Would it not be nice to think back and say, "I did the right thing. Thank you God." We finite creatures perform actions constantly throughout the day. If we offend God who is infinite, think of how grave that offense is. Think before you act.

AD MAJOREM DEI GLORIAM!